Skyrim With Guns…
So you mean Fallout right? Yeah… no. I guess winning multiple game of the year awards doesn’t carry the weight that it should if it can still leave you completely forgettable.
I suppose I’m a little late on this one, but I just found out this was one of the tag lines for the Farcry 3 advertising campaign.
At the end of the trailer you see that Machinima states that it’s, “Like Skyrim with guns.” This person clearly isn’t a gamer, probably just someone paid off to say nice things about this game. Fire this person. I’m also left questioning the quality of Far Cry 3 now. Not that I planned on getting this game anyway, but trying to bank on the success of another franchise seems like a cheap way to try to sell your game. The moral: Why does the person that wrote that tag line have a job in video game journalism but I don’t?
FUS RO DAH!!!
Because I’m hopelessly sick and can’t pull myself away from Skyrim, I’ve decided to share the top 10 videos I’ve seen on youtube that are Skyrim related. Yes I am completely aware that you could easily go on youtube yourself and check out these videos, but I’ve done all the work for you. No really, this is a cry for help. Really, help me. I can’t stop. Every waking moment is spent playing Skyrim. I’ve stopped eating, I’m losing sleep, my marriage suffers, food had no flavor anymore…
Anyway, top 10 videos in no particular order. Though the top one is totally #1 and if you disagree, you’re just wrong.
Excellent vocals. Do yourself a favor, if you watch no other of these videos, watch at least this one.
Great Dungeons and Dragons cartoon parody.
Because I love Mega Man…
This is great, I just wish they had the vocals with this as well.
Someone has a little too much time on their hands huh?
This may not fit into a “best of” list, but this person needs to receive as much hate mail as the internet will allow. And that’s a lot of hate mail. I mean, I get it. There’s glitches. But does that make it the worst RPG ever? No. And with a game that huge, I expect glitches. It doesn’t lessen my enjoyment of the game. I’d seek to kill the creator of this video, but I much prefer to force him into suicide.
There are many Skyrim unboxing videos out there, but this one is by far the best.
What’s a top 10 without a kitten video?
And what’s one more?
Why Video Games Are Better Than Girlfriends
Let me preface this post by saying that I am happily married. However getting there was an arduous adventure with many resets, extra continues, and TONS of minibosses along the way. If you’re a true gamer, you need to find yourself a gamer as well, or at least a girl that will understand your gaming compulsions. When you meet a girl and she says, “I broke up with my last boyfriend because all he did was play that stupid game where you kill everyone.” That’s basically an enormously huge, flashing, neon, warning sign that you should call it off right there and not spend the next 8 months together, because she is NEVER going to understand that the next few days after a new release you are going to be unreachable and completely occupied.
Now I know I’m not the first one to have these ideas and I’m sure there’s some lists out there already, but here’s what I got:
Video games are ALWAYS in the mood. All you have to do to get a game turned on is push a button.
When you’re finished, you don’t have to wait for your game to finish too.
Cheating is allowed in video games and the worst that can happen is maybe missing out on an achievement.
When you’re done with the game altogether, you can get some of the money you spent on it back.
Hanging out with your friends isn’t ruined when video games show up. In fact, playing games with your friends is encouraged and usually more fun as a group activity. Your girlfriend is unlikely to be happy about being a “group activity” for you and your friends, and if she is, then that’s a whole different problem.
If you get bored with the games you have, you can try out some new ones without any feelings of guilt and your other games won’t be jealous at all.
If you do something wrong you can just reload from your last save point instead of having to hear about it for the next few weeks.
When Warhammer: Space Marine came out, we were pretty heavily involved. We were up for hours all night, every night for a while. That is until Dark Souls. Dark Souls and I had a very bittersweet relationship, but we weren’t exclusive. I liked them both and was switching between Space Marine and Dark Souls whenever it felt right for me, and they were both cool with that. With Space Marine it was hot, fast, and intense and with Dark Souls it was nice to slow down and take my time knowing the reward would be worth the effort; They both had something different to offer, so I was keeping my options open. No one got jealous and I had nothing to answer for. Then along came Skyrim. Right now Skyrim and I are quite monogamous. I haven’t even had the urge to set my eyes on another video game. Every free moment I have, I spend with Skyrim. But that primal lust for Space Marine still exists and I know I can hit up Warhammer for a booty call without any consequences.
To sum it all up, video games are better than girlfriends because they don’t argue, they don’t complain, they’re always there exactly when you need them to be and if you get mad at them you can just walk away without having to “talk about it”.
My First Day With Skyrim
So I’ve had the game almost a full day now and I have too many good things to say about it. It would honestly be easier to list the faults, which are few. For starters there’s a texture bug for the 360 version. If you install the game instead of running it straight from the disc, the textures don’t look as good. But this is an easy fix and there’s one on the way. Secondly, there’s no mounted combat. There are horses, but you have to dismount to fight anything, which just seems like lazy programming. Things are allowed to fight you if you’re on horseback but you can’t fight back. That’s also just unfair. Lastly, for those of you who played Oblivion, you will remember the radial d-pad quick menu options, which allowed you to hotkey up to 8 spells/items/weapons and switch them on the fly. They did away with that in favor of a FAVORITES hotkey list. Instead of the radial menu, you just press up or down on the d-pad and it will bring up a list of everything you’ve favorited, but you can only select two quick one-press hotkeys, which you select using left and right. I don’t think one system is better than the other per se; you ultimately have more options with the Skyrim hotkey menu, but I preferred the radial menu because it essentially had 8 quick keys instead of 2, even though I couldn’t have as many altogether. But I really never needed more than 8 anyway. For PC, this is a non-issue. And that’s it. Those are the only negative things I’ve encountered so far and I consider them minor at most.
For such a huge game, I was worried that it would be daunting to get into. Even for me, a veteran of the entire series was intimidated by the ultimate bigness that I knew I was walking into. However, you are immediately immersed into the world with a very small learning curve. Though true to Elder Scrolls form, it’s not very long until they take off the leash and throw you out into the world saying, “go off now, have fun!” Once you customize your looks, your almost free to go on your way. Character classes have been done away with, but those felt vestigial even in Oblivion since I always just did custom classes anyway. You are what you do in this game and those are the skills that will level up.
In only a days worth of gameplay I’ve had many “wow!” moments already. I’ve been chased down by enraged mammoths, clobbered and sent hurling by angry giants, slain a dragon atop a treacherous mountain, stood at the edge over a huge waterfall to admire the endless landscape, knowing that everything that’s in view, no matter how far into the distance it may appear, is an explorable location. Then I leaped to my death from said waterfall. I’m not going to bother with screenshots or videos of me playing the game. You can find those anywhere else. Besides, who wants to watch someone else walking around just looking at the foliage? You’ll have more than enough time to do that yourself when you play it.
The one definitive moment where I audibly muttered a, “this is awesome” was during a hunting expedition while I was trying to gather furs to make leather. An assassin jumped out from behind me, whom I deftly dispatched. Upon looting her corpse I found a letter which, in no certain details, explained that someone had hired the Dark Brotherhood to have me killed. And as I understand it that’s all part of Skyrim’s dynamic quest system. The game sort of tailors itself to fit you depending on your actions and the quests you complete. It will bend itself in a way to generate quests that mirror your actions.
To summarize how excellent Skyrim is, if you don’t like the game – and I know this is gonna sound a little cliché – you should probably go kill yourself.